Baffled.

tgif

WooHOo!!!T.G.I.F thee 13th!heheheheheh!

that's just who I am (yeah, am) this week...(: AYos!bat kaya?hehehehe!

Growing notch f*cker!

SEVENTEEN

17


Being and living:

A life of a dad.

A 24/7 driver.

An inexperienced soldier.

A Jobless Financer.

A Stuggle for being a college student.

A downrigh independent.

A life-problems Connoisseur.

A straddle on a line called reality.

A lovestory that can only be seen on telenovelas.

A playgrounf of angst.

An interminable responsibility.

- - - Have been my life for the past few years- And i am only 17. haaayyy....

It was around 5 pm when i felt my cellphone vibrating on my pocket. At first, the message did not appear as alarming as it really was. It was My ate, asking me to rush her into the nearest hospital. I thought it was just something minor until i arrived home, and saw a girl laying on the floor while scorching in tremendous pain. Don't panic was the first thing that came to my mind. Instinctively, i rushed her to the nearest hospital while trying to contact some not-so-close titos for help because there was no one around (except for an unconcerned maid; my dad is in the states till now) to help us.

And now,here i am,living a life of a single dad, taking care of a 21 YO daughter, paying the hospital bills, sining the hospital waivers, buying fruits in the market for my sick childult (child-adult), etc.Thank God everything turned out fine after everything. (she is still in the hospital though)

As I was approaching my ate the moment i learned how serious the incedent was, I've gotten to realize how much responsibility was put unto my shoulders.Like having to make sure everything is fine n our house, having to know what time my ate will be home, having to know how much is our phone bill, our electic bill, and other oh-so-mature things in that sort. In short Responsibility not just for my ate, our house, our cars etc. but to my entire life as well. Literally, as of now, there's no one guiding my life. It is like Manning a self driven vehicle without even having anyone to guide you. I think aside from the known purposes for the movement of my dad to the US (he'll be back sometime soon, though); it's somehow meant for me to realize the true meaning of independence. It's weird when i hear someone screaming for independence,dont know why exactly, it just is. Perhaps,due to the responsibiltities given to me, i have had too much of independence already.

Here's one thing that i've learned, being downright independent (except economically) is not good at all. Somewhat, it's still better to hear someone nagging at you for going home late or for not going home at all; maybe because i just miss restrictions and the oh-so-kiddo things.

From then on, I started deeming such untimely responsibilities as a burden until i found out that such things would actually benifit me, someday. It's not that easy to explain things here, just try to read between the lines. Oh well, enough said.

Here's one thing funny about that realization, sa tingin ko pwede nako maging tatay?!hehehehehe!

Some pix:

Ironic. A nurse taken cared of a nurse. Yeah, shiz smylin. Ayos!


Zack pat chelsea titan . thank you guyz for being always there...

Fin'ly, a time to say goodbye to the burdens of the past and start embracing the interminable beauty of tommorow...

The previous year was comparatively fair to me, 365 days of full realizations; not just about some other things but most importantly,realization about some of the eccentricities of my character and of life. Maybe, prior to the things that i've been through the previous year, the innocent started wandering. I started treading out of the unsual run of things, from the reclusive kid to an activist,that is.

I must insinuate how proud i was for the things that i had been through the past year; Insunuation of haughtiness as you may think, but really, I was. You must be wondering why i used the word was...

Stop, relax and contemplate. Those were the words that filled my head during the last hours of year '05. On the impetus of my oh-so-sentimental-moment, one thing streaked on my mind, the your-being strong, experienced, and matured,in reality, should not be based on the things that you have done or been through. Contrary to the popular notion that experience hones a man's sword, I have learned that that very notion is the primary reason of some people's arrogance. Yes, free from any doubt, experience does a lot things, more than any book does; however, the distorted perception of that phrase makes the people think that if you have already been through alot of things - then you're great. Well then, if that is the case, i should be calling my self great. Apparently, the river does not flow that direction of ludicrousness. This realization is the reason why i used the word was on the above mentioned insinuation of haughtiness.

The challenges and predicaments i have faced last year do not guarantee a renewed and a stronger me. No matter how many battles you have been through, no matter how many times you beat Stonecold, no matter how long you have stayed in that crucial game - still, it does prove anything...

Neither how many fights you have picked nor how many things you have started would prove how strong and experienced you really are. It is not as to how or how many battles you have started, rather it is - how you decided to end them...

And now, it is the time to forget the gaffes of the past...it is another time for another chapter... Another set of boundless possibilities...Don't fear the future's great unknown - feel it!!! dont spend too much time on how to start this year - spend time on how to end it!!!

HapPnEwYEar!

***
On a lighter note...

I need a vaction from this vacation!

I have'nt been staying home for the past weeks; Living life as if i were a young executive secured with a high-paying job who can spend and spend without even considering earning. Sometimes i wonder why people rush to grow up and when they grow, they tend to get and act younger than their real age...Oh well, just a thought.

things that have happened for the past weeks.


@ the twins' debut.


ali april and mico


isa jilliane ali april donn kryss


LAban?hahahhaha!kagaguhan.


OyeAs! Go BERN!nyahahahaha!


nothingness @ xav's place


i can feel the enviousness in the air that i can cut it using a kitchen knife! i kno you guys kno wut im sayin here... right miguel?hahahahah!


zack and pat @ CPK town


mico, are you sick? carlo chel and mico


mico lookin constipated with madel and marie (new year's eve)


another constipated looking mico here wit ate


uh-oh!!!here's another one!this time with cookie!hahahaha!

***
random thoughts

*ever since the simbang gabi, i have been practicing a health-friendly-sleeping habit. I eat breakfast (my fisrt meal) aroung 5 pm, my lunch around 11 pm and my dinner around 5 am. haaayyy. rather than hopelessly putting and relentlessly commanding my twitchy head to go to sleep, i opted to appreciate the delights of nocturnal living.

*knina, was a head full of so many things to share here. now - a blank head.bat gnun?

*Havaianas have been ubiquitous lately. i even see some people wearing them at bars during gimmicks

*Contrary to what the conservatives say, paradoxical ecstacy (this aint 'the-illegal-drug') does some good things to us.

*Clubbing without having to spend even a centavo is the coolest thing(not that i'm kuripot). hoy!not freeloading! goin to openbar events lng!heheheh

*DLSU's trimester system sucks big tym. school resumes tom.

some pix again:


marie and mico chillin at pao's friend's bar after the newyear's eve sunlounge event @ rockwell.


some things that alcohol can do.